Why we need Valentine’s Day
And why these are words I never expected to say.
It’s the day for lovers if you didn’t already know. It’s a time where every shopfront goes très subtle, so there’s a good chance that it passed you by. I’m being facetious, it’s a total pandemonium out there; with red hearts, cuddly toys, chocolate covered everything paraded around as a reminder that love is edible, perishable and scarlet. I’ve always had a complicated relationship with Valentine’s Day — one day to demonstrate, talk about and reward love feels disingenuous and combined with societal pressure (which was much worse for my partner), it just all feels like a bit too much effort. Yet. Yet, I adore love in all of it’s showy, PDA glory. Love is truly delicious and regardless of your position, whom you love, how you love, your status; love, when given freely, is wonderful. And Valentine’s Day may be the thing to save us in this all consuming world we now live in.
Walk with me.
Life is busy. Whether it’s being early thirties and feeling the grind, working hard and long, hustling in any free hours; life is busy. It is easy to take people around us for granted, to forget to check-in, to become preoccupied when others talk to you about themselves. I am guilty of not seeing people for prolonged periods and then verbally downloading on them rather than engaging in a mutually beneficial conversation. I’m currently at my worst — the busiest I have ever been professionally, whilst trying to juggle personal projects, interests and rest; and managing to epically forget important dates, experiences, to get in touch with or be useful to the people I love the most. I am failing at being a good human currently and Valentine’s Day has somehow given me the nudge I needed to get my act together. Quite unexpected, I can tell you.
V Day has reminded me to show my love to the people I care most about. This reminder is judgement-less and has not been impacted by my lack of pairing, my distance from those I love, my busyness or my sense of failure. The reminder is to just show up, in whatever guise that may be. And this is where I think 14th February could change and improve us all — tuning out the stuff, focusing on more action. A voice note, a video chat, a picture, a post-it note… whatever it is, it’s about being clear that you are prioritizing someone, with no expectation of anything in return. If one day at the start of the year can be a catalyst for this to happen, to encourage this to be consistent behavior then I am thoroughly grateful that a day of love exists.
So hooray for a commercialized, consumer-focused, aesthetically displeasing day. Thank you for reminding me to show love, to speak about my love for others and to look inward and start to show a bit of kindness to myself. I bet Clintons never thought that they’d have such a profound effect, eh?
